On Long Trips and Subspecies

At the illustrious learning institution that is Bob Jones University, great distances frequently must be covered by a great deal of people.  Every Monday and Wednesday, I have a class in the Alumni building the hour right before chapel.  When class gets out at 10:50, a thousand people have to evacuate the building (which process takes about five minutes).  Due to construction, said thousand people have to go across one narrow bridge to get to the FMA for chapel. 

When one gets into the building, I have to navigate long, narrowish hallways inhabited by couples; depressed, good looking girls; groups of guys in Omega (to be covered later), and acads.  Acads are an interesting subspecies of Homo sapiens.  Usually the offspring of the yuppie (beings in pantsuits and using Bluetooth), the acad is a being about tenth grade, with braces (they always have braces), and some sort of track jacket from a retail outlet such as Aeropostale or American Eagle.  The young acad (ages 6-12) can frequently be found on the soccer field displaying mad soccer skills expected of them by the yuppie.  When an acad grows up into full maturity (some scholars doubt that maturity actually happens), it frequently becomes a member of Omega, the acad cult.

After one has tripped over several acad dating couples, he finally winds up sitting in his seat just about the time that a man in a moustache starts leading the singing of a 16th century version of a popular hymn, and the service begins.